Beatrice and Lucifer should know what a non-cartoon deer looks like. Not because it’s a graceful woodland creature, but so that later, while they’re driving a ZipCar through Rockland County on their way to Storm King for a weekend away because the city “is just too much right now”, they’ll know that the brown furry thing on the side of the road may SPRINT DIRECTLY INTO YOUR CAR FOR NO EFFING REASON. You can’t learn defensive deer driving at the Bronx Zoo.
Every single line in this piece is gold. Also, I once killed a deer while driving upstate. It was a defining moment for me.
New York City is a glorious paradox: a light in the darkness, yet a grim blemish on civilization. It makes you grow up fast and grow up mean, and yes that’s a Johnny Cash lyric but just go with it.